Kevin->Write(thoughts, browser, time)

If you are a graduate student, you get large volumes of email from disparate sources: secretaries, professors, students, the graduate school, nigerian millionaires who need your help transferring some money, and fabulous can't miss stock tips. It's pretty natural to divide your email into a number of different folders as it comes in: I have about twenty folders for different classes and responsibilities. Then the things that remain in your inbox are actually pressing, new emails, rather than an overwhelming jumbled mess of everything you've ever received. This is good.

But the folder system fucking blows. First, if you look at an email that is in a folder, you can't go directly back to that folder! The back button on the browser takes you out of the email system completely, and the only available onscreen option takes you to the inbox or to the general folders menu, requiring extra clicks every fucking time. Second, there is no way to search through all the folders! I'm trying to find an email that I think I've misfiled, and the only way to search is to individually select each folder and run the same search over and over again. This is totally fucking stupid. Third, there is no way to create a new folder directly from the inbox. You have to go to the folders menu. It's really sweet whenever I get a new email that deserves a new folder, and I have to go to the folders menu to make the folder, and then back to the inbox to put the email in the new folder. Big deal, you say? Hey, the programmer could put a create folder button on the inbox in ABOUT SIX SECONDS, and four of those seconds would be making sure he did it right in the first two. In fact, all of these features could be added by an experienced programmer in less than ten minutes.

Ah, you say, why not just set up Apple Mail to handle that shit for me? Glad you asked. First, APPLE MAIL CAN'T ACCESS ANY OF THE FOLDERS. It only pulls messages from the inbox. I would have to manually pull my 750+ saved messages back into the inbox, and re-sort them all BY HAND into new folders in Mail. This would be infuriating, but at least possible. But there's no point, because, second...OSU Webmail no longer has an open relay because spammers were taking advantage, which is fine. But that means that you need to have the smtp server address in order to send mail from whatever network you happen to be on. I HAVE A LAPTOP! I regularly access the web wirelessly from OSU wireless, Cafe Apropo, two different Cup O Joes', the Coffee Table, two different Brennan's, my sporadic stolen apartment connection, and occasionally from random other networks. What that means is that for each and every one of these networks, I need to know the internet service provider and figure out what their smtp server is, and then switch the Mail account between servers each and every time I switch networks, which is often several times a day. In short, no fucking way.

In conclusion, email is totally vital and is a total pain in the ass to use. Thank you for your time.

So there's this dude sitting across from me in the coffee shop and he fires up his computer and his desktop background is an Abercrombie and Fitch ad. And I thought, either that guy works for A&F or he's the biggest tool in the world. And then I thought, if he works for A&F he's definitely tied for the biggest tool in the world along with everyone else who works for A&F. Let's look at the logical form of this argument and see what we can conclude:

"either that guy works for A&F or he's the biggest tool in the world"
A v B

"if he works for A&F he's definitely tied for the biggest tool in the world along with everyone else who works for A&F"
A -> B

So, proof, Neil Tennant style:

A v B
-------
A         A -> B                  A v B
----------------                 ------
B                                          B
--------------------------------------------
                            B

Conclusion: B, "that guy is the biggest tool in the world"