Kevin->Write(thoughts, browser, time)

void Kevin::Write(char *thoughts, char *browser, int time) allows an object of the Kevin class to create printed english text. The function opens a blogger account (automatically associated with the particular Kevin object) using the web browser resouce identified by browser, and while time > 0 and interrupts are disabled, uses blogger to translate thoughts into text.

Sunday, February 29, 2004

 

Getting Old

Last night, the roommates and I were heading down to the bar when we passed one of those old fashioned Around-The World parties. So we stopped and after much discussion, wandered in to see what was up. What was up was, nine million freshmen, mostly girls, looking fifteen and easy, packed into two small rooms. We elbowed our way through a few of them, and then I turned to Ben and said, "You know what? We're 21. We don't have to do this anymore." So we turned and left, grabbing Jo and her friend on the way, and went to Brews, where we could sit and talk and smoke and drink what we please when we please, and the women look like women instead of scared little girls, and there isn't lurking Security making us feel like juvenile delinquents. And we talked about how damn old we must be for being happy to be there. It must be graduation time.

Friday, February 27, 2004

 

A Tale of Two IMs

Glsonion9: women are better judges of women anyway
Glsonion9: just ask your friend kant!
Inblooom: nope
Inblooom: of women's attractiveness? nope
Glsonion9: but of beauty, yes! and even guys will disagree with you on attractiveness, just as many other girls would disagree with whoever i might find particularly attractive...it's cloudy
Inblooom: no. i've never known a girl who was a good judge of beauty. you just aren't equipped
Glsonion9: equipped! you're hilarious. maybe you're the one who has no clue!
Inblooom: >:O ok maybe
Glsonion9: ok well as long as you're open to that possibility :-D
Inblooom: just to pacify you
Glsonion9: they need a little face that flicks people off or something


Beepgirles: i mean it all makes sense, but seems harsh
Inblooom: i think "it all makes sense, but seems harsh" describes my thoughts of just about everything. maybe i'll get it on my tombstone
Beepgirles: oh please, even in death you'll be wallowing
Inblooom: wallowing?
Inblooom: i didn't realize that i wallowed, or even what that means
Beepgirles: or whining, or...you know, "blah blah blah, the world sucks and i was a star for living in it anyway"
Beepgirles: just let me get MY hands on your tombstone
Inblooom: i'll make sure you die first

Monday, February 23, 2004

 

Here with my God

There's a Christian rock band that is redoing 80's covers with a religious twist. One song that they're doing is the awful Gary Numan song, Cars (also covered (terribly(more so than the original)) by Fear Factory several years ago). Here are the updated lyrics:

Here is my God
I feel safest of all
I can lock all my doors
It's the only way to live
with God

Here with my God
I can only receive
I can listen to Him
He keeps me stable for days
with God


Sunday, February 22, 2004

 

Style

There's a boy sitting next to me here in the computer lab, obviously fresh from chapter, wearing a blue sport coat, white shirt, and Oxford tie...with grey ratty sweats and white Pumas. What I want to know is, did he go to chapter dressed like this, in which case, what the hell is wrong with his fraternity. Or did he go home afterward and decide, you know, I'm looking pretty hot on top, so that can stay, but the dress shoes and pants are uncomfortable, so those have to go...in which case, he was dropped on his head as a child a few too many times.

Friday, February 20, 2004

 

I'm a Foreigner Groupie

Hot blooded, check on and see
I've got a fever of a hundred and three
Come on baby do you do more than dance
I'm HOT BLOODED, HOT BLOODED.

Thank you very much. Next week: Waiting for a girl like you.

Wednesday, February 18, 2004

 

Positive Reinforcement

Inblooom: i don't remember my dreams unless i am awakened and then i return to sleep for an hour or so
Beepgirles: yeah, i usually have residue for a half hour or so after i wake up and then it's gone. if they are really weird or fun i write them down
Inblooom: i tried that. it bored me. and i didn't remember enough of them
Beepgirles: well, that is just because you are a boring and forgettable person

Tuesday, February 17, 2004

 

More Vanity

I'm finally finished rewriting my functionalism and artificial intelligence paper, which can be downloaded from here(filename AI Research Paper Rewrite.doc). I'll either be presenting it at the undergraduate philosophy conference in Memphis, or sending it to one of the top-level undergraduate journals, or failing either of those, Episteme, our undergraduate philosophy journal here at Denison. Episteme is actually well-respected, but I'm a staff editor and I don't want to look at all underhanded...Enjoy!

Monday, February 16, 2004

 

Just Ask Owen

A very funny and brilliant man named Owen Fulrice did an advice column with this title in AOL's Hecklers Online forum from about 1996 to 2000. I'm fairly sure that it's not on the web anywhere anymore...until now. I've just put up about the first half of his columns up on my Denison webpage, and anyone who enjoys this blog would really like it I think, as I've styled my thinking and writing after him to an embarrassing degree. When you have a spare 8 hours, read them in numerical order from Owen.txt to Owen29.txt even though they're not in that order...my FTP program hates me. I'll post the latter half in a few days. Salud!
 

Road Trip! And Joblessness

(from common room)

Will: We were thinking of starting a week later than we'd planned, because of my sisters graduation. And Tim says it's ok as far as his sisters wedding goes.
Kevin: What did Ben say?
Will: It's fine with him as long as he doesn't have a job that starts right after graduation.
Kevin: Oh. He won't.
Ben(from his room): fuuuuuuck youuuuuuuuuuuuu!

Saturday, February 14, 2004

 

Valentineless

(After discussing Dan's valentine's day plans)

Inblooom: that sounds like fun. i'm rather valentineless myself, but that's ok
Mickelswit: I've spent many a Valentine's Day in the same situation. Everyone always treats you with a sort of awkwardness, as though you killed a squirrel to watch it die.

Friday, February 13, 2004

 

Ben's movie illustrates our pathetic lives

Kevin: How's the shooting going?
Ben: Pretty well. Jesse just went over to Ashley's room to grab a prop.
Kevin: Oh? What did you need?
Ben: Actually, just a few beers.
Kevin: Jesus, what a sad bunch of college seniors we are, with no beer.
Tim: Hey, I have one beer.
Ben: Awesome. We'll split it and get buzzed, do the nose on the baseball bat thing. Where's my shot glass?



Wednesday, February 11, 2004

 

Ellen's Research

Beepgirles: so i am trying to think of my title
Beepgirles: you know, the official one
Inblooom: "Fast Cars and Loose Women"
Beepgirles: how about "nationalism and the author: joycean and contemporary representations of ireland"
Beepgirles: i really didn't want to pull out the colon
Inblooom: i like mine better
Beepgirles: tee hee...those loose irish women, all right
Inblooom: if you must refer to ireland, you have to call it i-rizzy
Beepgirles: oh please
Beepgirles: why don't i just come out and say "j-dog joyce is the shizzle"
Inblooom: oh get serious. that's ridiculous


Sunday, February 08, 2004

 

John and I talk on AIM like 110 lbs. of awesome

Inblooom: john. come watch cavs tonight, dick
censored25: i would love to but justin august is in town
Inblooom: really? bizarre
Inblooom: what are you guys doing?
censored25: i think going bowling maybe
Inblooom: sweet
censored25: i can totally come on wednesday though
Inblooom: tnt monday against boston too
censored25: yeah but i got "commitments" on monday nights
Inblooom: commitments? what are those?
censored25: besides im sure pierce will drop 40 as per usual.
censored25: haha
Inblooom: did you have fun at the dance?
censored25: yeah i did, how about yourself?
censored25: free shrimp.
Inblooom: had a great time, probably the best time i've ever had at a dance
censored25: awesome
censored25: mini-quiches too!
Inblooom: verily they were bad-ass
censored25: but mostly free shrimp.
censored25: i like the soft blue light under the ice chest thingy. very white trash camaro
censored25: when i saw that i tossed back my mullet over my shoulders and threw up the devil horns
Inblooom: i missed out on that somehow, too bad. also, the camaro is a fine automobile, white trash or no. i'd drive one, and crank up the kid rock
censored25: you're a true american badass.
Inblooom: bawitaba! or some such
censored25: haha
censored25: alright, i have to go get polluted, i mean eat at curtis. later
Inblooom: heh, have fun with your so called "social life"
censored25: my mom would be so proud.
censored25: peace

Friday, February 06, 2004

 

Will is Funny

(Sitting in the car, pumping ourselves up before the career fair, feeling glum about our prospects. An excessively hot girl walks in front of us.)

W: SHE'S getting a job.

(Later, on the way home)

W: You know that guy Tony, who's in Ben's frat?
K: Tony Lai?
W: Yeah...have you seen his hair lately? He looks like Liu Kang from Mortal Kombat.
 

Dear Microsoft,

"In less than a year, Apple has created what is arguably the best all-around web browser on any platform, and has done so in a way that allows it to interoperate with millions of web sites that are designed for severely broken Microsoft and Netscape browsers from the previous decade.

Safari is "best of breed" in my estimation. What it may lack in its ability to fully penetrate the bass-ackwards world of Windows-IE-specific web sites, it more than makes up for with its excellent, and rapidly evolving support for actual web standards and its elegant (if still a bit feature-thin) user interface.

It also proves that Apple is capable of neatly replacing formerly "essential" (usually Microsoft) software when it puts its mind to it. A web browser is not on the same scale as an office suite, but I'm starting to believe."
~John Siracusa, Ars Technica


Watch your backs.


Thursday, February 05, 2004

 

Failure

Glsonion9: you are slacking off on your blog!
Inblooom: the truth...not much exciting has happened lately
Inblooom: eat sleep swim play soccer, and every now and again do some work
Glsonion9: well but your blog is usually more amusing things than exciting things
Inblooom: that's true also. no excuses. i'll do better
 

Objective from my resume

"Seeking a position in which my array of technical, written, and leadership skills are each exercised and challenged, in which my work is both valued and valuable, and in which my humanity is respected by my co-workers and superiors."

If I could just have those three things, I'd work for minimum wage or close to it. Shh. Don't tell employers.

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